Marriage and Relationships quiz answers
1.The best single predictor of the success of a marriage is the age of the couple when they get married.
TRUE Ideally, both partners should be independent and mature before marriage. Independence and maturity tend to increase with age and experience and it is true that the single best predictor of marital success is the age of the couple. In the UK in 2000, the average age rose again to 34.8 years for the ‘groom and 32.1 years for the bride.
2. Love is all you need for a happy marriage.
FALSE Sadly love is not all you need to create a happy marriage. Almost all of the couples who marry would say they were “in love”, yet about 1/3 end up getting divorced, often in the first couple of years.
3. The likelihood of divorce can be predicted by the quality of the relationship before marriage (i.e. when courting).
TRUE. Someone once said, “Nothing in the world could make human life happier than to increase the number of strong marriages.” A lot of serious research has shown that the relationship established during courtship is an excellent predictor of the strength and success of the marriage which follows and is built upon that strong foundation.
4. Couples usually prepare more for their wedding than for their marriage.
TRUE Getting married and staying married are two very different things. Dr David Olson recently said, “Couples usually spend more time and money preparing for their wedding which lasts a day than for their marriage which is intended to last a lifetime. They will invest more energy in choosing a wedding cake which is gobbled down by hungry wedding guests in a few minutes, than they spend learning about the fundamental dynamics of marriage and how to improve their skills as partners.”
5. Marriage may be disappointing and frustrating at first.
TRUE Marriage is a more difficult transition than most people anticipate. This is true even for couples who are well prepared and feel good about their relationship. The newlywed period (about the first two years) is a difficult transition and does not happen easily and without stress.
6. Getting married is a good way to establish your independence from your birth family.
FALSE Young adults have a natural drive to succeed on their own. Becoming ‘independent’ is something that only you can do; you cannot rely on your partner to do it for you.
7. Living together before marriage (cohabiting) helps couples develop a more satisfying marriage.
FALSE Although there are many theories as to why living together could provide good ‘training’ to improve a subsequent marriage, most evidence points in the other direction. Divorce rates are significantly higher for couples who have cohabited.
8. Financial issues are the most common cause of problems within families and couple relationships.
TRUE One group of researchers found that 37% of all the married couples in their study believed money was the number one problem in their marriage.
9. Relationship skills come naturally and cannot be learned.
FALSE The skills required to build healthy relationships are skills that can be learned. Increasing your general knowledge about relationships, families and marriage will help you make better choices and develop quality relationships. Premarital preparation can help you improve your skills and get your marriage off to a good start.
10. Most people who get divorced don’t ever remarry.
FALSE As many as 75% of divorcees will remarry. Many second marriages create step families, which bring their own challenges to the marital relationship. Also, sadly, second marriages fail at a higher rate than do first marriages even where there are no stepchildren involved. Thus preparation for a second marriage is even more critical than for a first marriage.
The questions are from “Building Relationships; Developing Skills for Life” by Dr David Olson et al. For more information, please contact Prepare/Enrich UK.